DR. SHELLY ARNESON AUTHOR AND CONSULTANT
  • Home
  • Blogs and News
  • Workshops
  • Consultation
  • Shop
  • Links
  • Contact Information
  • Dissertation
Picture

Happy Communicating
​

When there is an elephant in the room...

4/28/2019

1 Comment

 
...introduce it. 
What does that mean in your life?  For me, it means we shouldn't ignore things that stand in the way of communication or relationships with other people.  Whether at work or at home, there will always be those little things that get under our skin:  the teacher down the hall that talks so loud, I have to shut my own door to hear myself teach; the neighbor whose dogs bark incessantly when I try so hard to keep mine from making any sound when they are outside; the custodians who stand in the hallway at school and argue with each other; and the list goes on, ad infinitum. 
But the real issue is what we do about those things.  I heard someone say the other day that they use their middle finger to tell other drivers what they think of their driving.  Somebody please tell me when, in the history of the universe (or at least with the advent of cars), do you think someone who has just been "communicated with" by the middle finger of another driver all of a sudden says, "Gee, that really makes sense. I am going to make a pact that I will be a more conscientious driver from now on."  I am guessing the odds are better to play the lottery.  So, perhaps, within the confines of our own car is likely not the time or place to speak our truth (or, worse yet, only our own perception of the truth). 
But for so many of us who work in the field of education, what we do and how we communicate is a model (intentional or not) for students who will become the adults of tomorrow.  And, by the way, for people like Dave and me, who don't have human children of our own, these future adults will likely be, as Dave says, "changing my diapers someday".  I'd prefer they have really good role models in the areas of respect and communication (they can learn the diaper-changing skills later on).   When I walk in a school and hear two staff members arguing with each other in the middle of the hallway, my first thought is: I am not the only one hearing this exchange. The 1st graders who are walking to Music class are hearing it as well.  But people argue, right? That is simply a fact of life.  The issue is: how, when and where we do that. 
For myself, I find it difficult, any more, to let something that is bothering me build up to the point that it warrants a blow-up.  Instead,  my serenity and peace of mind have become more important than traffic. But that doesn't mean I don't address something that is bothering me. On the contrary, if I have a poor experience with a hotel stay, for example,  I will be upfront about it. Not long ago, I stayed at a lovely hotel for work.  The check-in went seamlessly, the room was clean,  and I had a nice view of the parking lot (well, you can't have everything, right?). However, I awoke two hours into my slumber to what I thought was a person IN my room (I was staying by myself, so nobody should be in my room).  Sitting up, I listened. Nope. Nobody was in my room, but the guy next door might as well have been, as he was snoring, and I could hear him, loud and clear! Nice hotel, thin walls.  When the hot water during my shower ran out, I found myself doubly frustrated. Not a great night's sleep and then I don't get hot water? Instead of raging, however, I simply stopped at the front desk and let them know what they could fix (the hot water) and what they likely couldn't fix (thin walls).  The front desk manager credited me some points to my hotel loyalty account for my trouble, and he told me they were extremely sorry.  Had I simply gone on my way, complaining to everyone ABOUT my stay, or run ranting to the front desk manager, I likely still wouldn't have had a great night's sleep nor would I have some extra points in my hotel account.  In other words, speaking up in a respectful way pays off.
The same holds true for educators who work with each other every day.  I have been privileged enough to witness first-hand, as an administrator, teachers and staff who found ways to talk through problems they were experiencing in their relationships.
As a professor, I witnessed two of my online students do this exact thing this week.  While they had disagreed on a particular issue in the discussion thread, they both apologized to each other for their miscommunication and resolved to think before "speaking" in the future.  That, to me, is how communication and relationships are supposed to work! I pray this will be the case for you, today and every day!

Happy Communicating!

Shelly
​

Picture
1 Comment
Hailey Garcia
4/14/2025 03:17:02 pm

EFFECTIVE WAY TO GET YOUR HERPES CURE/MEDICINE ORDER FROM DR. ODUNGA HERBAL REMEDIES

My name is Hailey Garcia and I am from New Jersey. My herpes virus turned to war after 2 years of living with it. I have tried different medical procedures to cure my herpes but to no avail. Most people think herpes is only a minor skin irritation of which herpes has long term effects on health and passes through the bloodstream and can be easily contracted through sexual intercourse. I knew I had herpes from the first day I started feeling itchy in my pubic area and the pain was very unbearable. I couldn't stand it anymore. After 2 years of trying other means to get rid of it, I had to contact Doctor Odunga to help me with a permanent cure. I saw his email and whats-app number from a testimony I read online from a lady who was also helped by him in curing infertility problems, I had faith and contacted him. He assured me of his work and I ordered his herbal medicine. Within 5 days, I didn't feel any pain anymore and within 2 weeks, my skin was all cleared and smooth. I am very grateful to you sir and I write this testimony as others have done to bring those having faith to you sir. If you have herpes or other similar disease and you want it cured, kindly contact Doctor Odunga, Whats-App (wa.me/+2348167159012) OR Email [email protected]

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Shelly Arneson

    Picture

    Archives

    January 2024
    December 2023
    November 2023
    October 2023
    September 2023
    August 2023
    July 2023
    June 2023
    May 2023
    April 2023
    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    October 2012
    September 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    March 2012
    February 2012
    January 2012

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

Proudly powered by Weebly
Photos from shixart1985 (CC BY 2.0), Tjeerd, Johnragai-Moment Catcher, UnknownNet Photography, Mr. Bombdiggity, wuestenigel, quinn.anya, Chocolate Geek, Jorbasa, Leonard J Matthews, JefferyTurner, Golf Resort Achental, fabola, www.ilmicrofono.it, m01229, Heinrich Plum, Titanic Belfast, Strocchi, Cultural viewpoints from around the world, katrienberckmoes, fabola, susivinh, fourcroft, Sweet Dreamz Design, usarjnco, Eldriva, symphony of love, cordalth, boellstiftung, David Holt London, maryjohum, Tony Webster, Rich.S., ZK-OJQ, davidmulder61, garryknight, ChrisPerriman, mrkrndvs, goatling, YellowstoneNPS, Frederick Homes for Sale, Mary_on_Flickr, yourbestdigs, Dean Hochman, guillenperez, Janitors, rachaelvoorhees, shixart1985, FootMassagez, marcoverch, classroomcamera, Rodrigo Soldon 2, symphony of love, formulanone, Ivy Dawned, wuestenigel
  • Home
  • Blogs and News
  • Workshops
  • Consultation
  • Shop
  • Links
  • Contact Information
  • Dissertation