Let's go hiking again!

My sister and her husband have been visiting in Tucson the last few days.  Great times eating, seeing the sights, catching up and hiking with the dogs.  Fun stuff. 
This morning, we got up super early, put the dogs in the back of the SUV and headed three minutes up the road to the Ritz to hike.  Lest you jeer at our choice of venues, one only parks at the ritzy Ritz before hitting the rugged trails where desert and mountain meet.
But, since it is the Ritz, we have to go through the gate.
We pulled up, the young guy comes out and says, "Good morning, you all look like you're ready to go hiking."
"Yep!" we proclaimed.  "It's 7:00 and we are good to go!"
He helpfully warns us, "You'll probably want to be off the trails by 11:00.  It is supposed to get pretty hot."
"Good to know", we reply, quietly whispering to each other, "We're lucky if we could hike for 1 hour, much less four."
Just then, the gate guard queries, "Do you need any water? Any male traps?" 
SAY WHAT?? 
Male traps?  They give those out at the Ritz?  I'm always open for a new adventure in hiking, but this might be a bit much.
"No we have our own"; "We don't need a trap; we just shoot 'em" and "Is this a Ritz exclusive?" were all belated questions we had.  Too quickly, though, the gate guard recovered, laughed and said, "I mean 'trail maps'?" 
OH! Not nearly as much fun but maybe twice as useful, we thought, as we declined and drove off, laughing hysterically.
We are currently planning our next hike, immediately.

Happy Communicating!!

Shelly