DR. SHELLY ARNESON AUTHOR AND CONSULTANT
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Happy Communicating
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If you don't ask, you won't get...

8/22/2021

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     Dave taught me this years ago. I would often get frustrated with businesses who I felt like should read my mind.  I would go in and complain to a business for messing up an order.  Dave began asking me, "What do you want? Whatever you want, you should ask for it."  Hmmm....what a novel idea.  
So, I think I began learning a really good lesson.  Ask! And, even better yet, ask nicely.  Now that really is a novel idea, apparently, if you watch people up at the airline gates speaking to gate agents.  I witness people yelling at those poor gate agents or even at flight attendants (about a flight that is going to get in late) for the potential of missing connecting flights (as if the flight attendants could make the plane go any faster!).   
     Speaking of flights, I am traveling for work this week.  I had booked my flights a couple of months ago.  Apparently, my bozo move was that I booked one of the flights a day too early (actually, the day I will be working with a school district)----oops! I just realized that yesterday.  I decided to call and see what we could do to get the flight moved forward a day.  The agent I spoke with said, "You can, but it will add $1000 to your cost."  WHAT???!  I almost screamed that to her.  Instead, I said, "I am truly a loyal customer.  I'm hopeful you can take pity on my idiocy and find out if we can get that change done without charge."  She said, "Let me go check with our pricing department" and off she went. Five minutes later, she came back and told me it was all done with no charge. She asked me to refresh my application and see if it was good.  I looked, and I joked with her, "Oh wait, it looks like I am going to Jamaica now."  She said, "Oh no, wait!" and then I said, "Just kidding...it's all good."  She started cracking up, and we both laughed, and then I said, "You are a rockstar! I would send you to Jamaica if I could".  She was so grateful she could help, and I was certainly grateful for her help.  
     When we went to Hawaii a couple of weeks ago, one of the places we stayed was absolutely beautiful.  It also had a couple of issues, such as a non-working microwave and a sliding screen door that did not slide.  We reported the issues to the management company that, by the way, did nothing to help out ("We'll try to get someone out there in two or three days"---we were only there a week).  I emailed the lady who owned the property, and I simply told her that her place was just lovely but we were having troubles getting the management company to help us out.  We asked if she might be able to help us coordinate with them, and she did so much more than that.  She refunded a bunch of money to us and apologized profusely for their negligence. 
     I think I have realized how much people appreciate customers being kind.  Simply asking instead of griping is the difference that it takes to sometimes get exactly what you want...and more! Instead of being resentful, we end up being pleasantly surprised many times.  Thanks, Dave, for your words of wisdom that help me not only get better things in life but they make me BE better in my life. 
     I am going to go ask Dave (nicely, of course) if he will scratch my back where I just had some stitches put in this week for a minor procedure. I am sure he will do it if I say "Pretty please".  
Happy Communicating!
Shelly
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