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Happy Communicating
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Communication matters

8/4/2013

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Communication really matters, doesn't it?
Misunderstandings occur on an everyday .  It's what we do after the miscommunication that really matters, right?
Yesterday, Dave and I went to brunch together.  Between the times I am out of town lately and then the fact that he was out of town all last week, we were so grateful to spend time together.  The waitress took our drink order.  Water for Dave.  Diet coke for me.  The waitress came back with our drinks, set them down, and looked at me and said, "Just one diet coke for you?"  Both Dave and I cocked our heads to the side, and he laughed and asked, "As opposed to what?"  She couldn't figure out what she had said incorrectly. Then she got it. This time she said,"Oh, I meant, I know you want a diet coke" to me and then she looked at Dave and said, "I just wondered if you wanted anything else besides water?"  We all agreed it sounded funny, though, to hear it the way she said it.
We all laughed and enjoyed spending brunch time together.  Dave tipped her well for her good service AND her good humor in being able to laugh at herself.
Contrast that with a conversation I had with someone with whom we do business about my new business.  We have entrusted him to help keep our new corporation straight.  I looked on my bank statement the other morning and was TOTALLY surprised to see a huge amount withdrawn to the IRS.  "Taxes", he told us when I frantically texted and called and almost screamed, "How did this happen?  Why didn't I know the amount?  Why didn't I know when this was going to happen?  Oh and by the way, this is like a 50% tax ---that is Crazy!"  His reaction was "Oh, I didn't know how much you wanted me to take out." and "Oh, I sent an email but to the wrong address" 
Does anyone hear the major problem (besides the fact that we had way too much taken out from my business account for taxes??)  I was the one frantic---with the problem----and he was not taking any responsibility for the problem.  
Wouldn't it be nice if every time we had a miscommunication or problem, both parties too equal responsibility for the miscommunication and for making it better?  
I believe we can make this happen.  If, each time we have a miscommunication, we can ask ourselves, "What was my part in this?" and address that, perhaps people wouldn't end up so frustrated, and both parties could end up laughing and enjoying time like we did at brunch.
Just for today, perhaps think about how you might contribute to a potential (or actual) miscommunication and 
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